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st. ives-第8部分

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My head swam; the sweat poured off my face; I must have grown 

deadly pale。



He removed his hand as suddenly as he had laid it there。  'What is 

wrong with you?' said he。



'It is nothing;' said I。  'A qualm。  It has gone by。'



'Are you sure?' said he。  'You are as white as a sheet。'



'Oh no; I assure you!  Nothing whatever。  I am my own man again;' I 

said; though I could scarce command my tongue。



'Well; shall I go on again?' says he。  'Can you follow me?'



'Oh; by all means!' said I; and mopped my streaming face upon my 

sleeve; for you may be sure in those days I had no handkerchief。



'If you are sure you can follow me。  That was a very sudden and 

sharp seizure;' he said doubtfully。  'But if you are sure; all 

right; and here goes。  An affair of honour among you fellows would; 

naturally; be a little difficult to carry out; perhaps it would be 

impossible to have it wholly regular。  And yet a duel might be very 

irregular in form; and; under the peculiar circumstances of the 

case; loyal enough in effect。  Do you take me?  Now; as a gentleman 

and a soldier。'



His hand rose again at the words and hovered over me。  I could bear 

no more; and winced away from him。  'No;' I cried;  'not that。  Do 

not put your hand upon my shoulder。  I cannot bear it。  It is 

rheumatism;' I made haste to add。  'My shoulder is inflamed and 

very painful。'



He returned to his chair and deliberately lighted a cigar。



'I am sorry about your shoulder;' he said at last。  'Let me send 

for the doctor。'



'Not in the least;' said I。  'It is a trifle。  I am quite used to 

it。  It does not trouble me in the smallest。  At any rate; I don't 

believe in doctors。'



'All right;' said he; and sat and smoked a good while in a silence 

which I would have given anything to break。  'Well;' he began 

presently; 'I believe there is nothing left for me to learn。  I 

presume I may say that I know all。'



'About what?' said I boldly。



'About Goguelat;' said he。



'I beg your pardon。  I cannot conceive;' said I。



'Oh;' says the major; 'the man fell in a duel; and by your hand!  I 

am not an infant。'



'By no means;' said I。  'But you seem to me to be a good deal of a 

theorist。'



'Shall we test it?' he asked。  'The doctor is close by。  If there 

is not an open wound on your shoulder; I am wrong。  If there is … '  

He waved his hand。  'But I advise you to think twice。  There is a 

deuce of a nasty drawback to the experiment … that what might have 

remained private between us two becomes public property。'



'Oh; well!' said I; with a laugh; 'anything rather than a doctor!  

I cannot bear the breed。'



His last words had a good deal relieved me; but I was still far 

from comfortable。



Major Chevenix smoked awhile; looking now at his cigar ash; now at 

me。  'I'm a soldier myself;' he says presently; 'and I've been out 

in my time and hit my man。  I don't want to run any one into a 

corner for an affair that was at all necessary or correct。  At the 

same time; I want to know that much; and I'll take your word of 

honour for it。  Otherwise; I shall be very sorry; but the doctor 

must be called in。'



'I neither admit anything nor deny anything;' I returned。  'But if 

this form of words will suffice you; here is what I say: I give you 

my parole; as a gentleman and a soldier; there has nothing taken 

place amongst us prisoners that was not honourable as the day。'



'All right;' says he。  'That was all I wanted。  You can go now; 

Champdivers。'



And as I was going out he added; with a laugh: 'By the bye; I ought 

to apologise: I had no idea I was applying the torture!'



The same afternoon the doctor came into the courtyard with a piece 

of paper in his hand。  He seemed hot and angry; and had certainly 

no mind to be polite。



'Here!' he cried。  'Which of you fellows knows any English?  Oh!' … 

spying me … 'there you are; what's your name!  YOU'LL do。  Tell 

these fellows that the other fellow's dying。  He's booked; no use 

talking; I expect he'll go by evening。  And tell them I don't envy 

the feelings of the fellow who spiked him。  Tell them that first。'



I did so。



'Then you can tell 'em;' he resumed; 'that the fellow; Goggle … 

what's his name? … wants to see some of them before he gets his 

marching orders。  If I got it right; he wants to kiss or embrace 

you; or some sickening stuff。  Got that?  Then here's a list he's 

had written; and you'd better read it out to them … I can't make 

head or tail of your beastly names … and they can answer PRESENT; 

and fall in against that wall。'



It was with a singular movement of incongruous feelings that I read 

the first name on the list。  I had no wish to look again on my own 

handiwork; my flesh recoiled from the idea; and how could I be sure 

what reception he designed to give me?  The cure was in my own 

hand; I could pass that first name over … the doctor would not know 

… and I might stay away。  But to the subsequent great gladness of 

my heart; I did not dwell for an instant on the thought; walked 

over to the designated wall; faced about; read out the name 

'Champdivers;' and answered myself with the word 'Present。'



There were some half dozen on the list; all told; and as soon as we 

were mustered; the doctor led the way to the hospital; and we 

followed after; like a fatigue party; in single file。  At the door 

he paused; told us 'the fellow' would see each of us alone; and; as 

soon as I had explained that; sent me by myself into the ward。  It 

was a small room; whitewashed; a south window stood open on a vast 

depth of air and a spacious and distant prospect; and from deep 

below; in the Grassmarket the voices of hawkers came up clear and 

far away。  Hard by; on a little bed; lay Goguelat。  The sunburn had 

not yet faded from his face; and the stamp of death was already 

there。  There was something wild and unmannish in his smile; that 

took me by the throat; only death and love know or have ever seen 

it。  And when he spoke; it seemed to shame his coarse talk。



He held out his arms as if to embrace me。  I drew near with 

incredible shrinkings; and surrendered myself to his arms with 

overwhelming disgust。  But he only drew my ear down to his lips。



'Trust me;' he whispered。  'JE SUIS BON BOUGRE; MOI。  I'll take it 

to hell with me; and tell the devil。'



Why should I go on to reproduce his grossness and trivialities?  

All that he thought; at that hour; was even noble; though he could 

not clothe it otherwise than in the language of a brutal farce。  

Presently he bade me call the doctor; and when that officer had 

come in; raised a little up in his bed; pointed first to himself 

and then to me; who stood weeping by his side; and several times 

repeated the expression; 'Frinds … frinds … dam frinds。'



To my great surprise; the doctor appeared very much affected。  He 

nodded his little bob…wi
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