eben holden-第45部分

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ne　says　ever　'I　was；'and　never　'I　am'in　that　plea。　I　could　even　see　it　myself　then　and　there；　but　I　was　so　great　a　fool　I　smiled　and　spoke　fairly　to　the　young　man　although　I　could　have　wrung　his　neck　with　rage。　There　was　a　little　stir　and　a　passing　whisper　in　the　crowd　as　she　stood　waiting　for　the　prelude。　Then　she　sang　the　ballad　of　Auld　Robin　Grey　…　not　better　than　I　had　heard　her　sing　it　before；　but　so　charmingly　there　were　murmurs　of　delight　going　far　and　wide　in　the　audience　when　she　had　finished。　Then　she　sang　the　fine　melody　of　'Angels　ever　Bright　and　Fair　；　and　again　the　old　ballad　she　and　I　had　heard　first　from　the　violin　of　poor　Nick　Goodall。

By　yon　bonnie　bank　an'by　yon　bonnie　bonnie　brae　The　sun　shines　bright　on　Loch　Lomond　Where　me　an'me　true　love　were　ever　won't　if　gae　On　the　bonnie；　bonnie　bank　o'Loch　Lomond。

Great　baskets　of　roses　were　handed　to　her　as　she　came　down　from　the　platform　and　my　confusion　was　multiplied　by　their　number　for　I　had　not　thought　to　bring　any　myself。

I　turned　to　Uncle　Eb　who；　now　and　then；　had　furtively　wiped　his　eyes。　'My　stars！'he　whispered；　'ain't　itreemarkable　grand！　Never　heard　ner　seen　nothin'like　thet　in　all　my　born　days。　An't'think　it's　my　little　Hope。　

He　could　go　no　further。　His　handkerchief　was　in　his　hand　while　he　took　refuge　in　silence。

Going　home　the　flowers　were　heaped　upon　our　laps　and　I；　with　Hope　beside　me；　felt　some　restoration　of　comfort。

'Did　you　see　Trumbull？'Mrs　Fuller　asked。　'He　sat　back　of　us　and　did　seem　to　enjoy　it　so　much　…　your　singing。　He　was　almost　cheerful。　

'Tell　me　about　Mr　Trumbull；'I　said。　'He　is　interesting。　

'Speculator；'said　Mrs　Fuller。　'A　strange　man；　successful；　silent；　unmarried　and；　I　think；　in　love。　Has　beautiful　rooms　they　say　on　Gramercy　Park。　Lives　alone　with　an　old　servant。　We　got　to　know　him　through　the　accident。　Mr　Fuller　and　he　have　done　business　together　…　a　great　deal　of　it　since　then。　Operates　in　the　stock　market。　

A　supper　was　waiting　for　us　at　home　and　we　sat　a　long　time　at　the　table。　I　was　burning　for　a　talk　with　Hope　but　how　was　I　to　manage　it？　We　rose　with　the　others　and　went　and　sat　down　together　in　a　corner　of　the　great　parlour。　We　talked　of　that　night　at　the　White　Church　in　Faraway　when　we　heard　Nick　Goodall　play　and　she　had　felt　the　beginning　of　a　new　life。

'I've　heard　how　well　you　did　last　year；'she　said；　'and　how　nice　you　were　to　the　girls。　A　friend　wrote　me　all　about　it。　How　attentive　you　were　to　that　little　Miss　Brown！　

'But　decently　polite；'I　answered。　'One　has　to　have　somebody　or　…　or　　　be　a　monk。　

'One　has　to　have　somebody！'she　said；　quickly；　as　she　picked　at　thc　flower　on　her　bosom　and　looked　down　at　it　soberly。　'That　is　true　one　has　to　have　somebody　and；　you　know；　I　haven　t　had　any　lack　of　company　myself。　By　the　way；　I　have　news　to　tell　you。　

She　spoke　slowly　and　in　a　low　voice　with　a　touch　of　sadness　in　it。　I　felt　the　colour　mounting　to　my　face。

'News！'I　repeated。　'What　news；　I…lope？　

'I　am　going　away　to　England；'she　said；　'with　Mrs　Fuller　if　…　if　mother　will　let　me。　I　wish　you　would　write　and　ask　her　to　let　me　go。　

I　was　unhorsed。　What　to　say　I　knew　not；　what　it　meant　I　could　vaguely　imagine。　There　was　a　moment　of　awkward　silence。

'Of　course　I　will　ask　her　if　you　wish　to　go；'I　said。　'When　do　you　sail？　

'They　haven　t　fixed　the　day　yet。　

She　sat　looking　down　at　her　fan；　a　beautiful；　filmy　thing　between　braces　of　ivory。　Her　knees　were　crossed；　one　dainty　foot　showing　under　ruffles　of　lace。　I　looked　at　her　a　moment　dumb　with　admiration。

'What　a　big　man　you　have　grown　to　be　Will；'she　said　presently。　'I　am　almost　afraid　of　you　now。　

She　was　still　looking　down　at　the　fan　and　that　little　foot　was　moving　nervously。　Now　was　my　time。　I　began　framing　an　avowal。　I　felt　a　wild　impulse　to　throw　my　strong　arms　about　her　and　draw　her　close　to　me　and　feel　the　pink　velvet　of　her　fair　face　upon　mine。　ff1　had　only　done　it！　But　what　with　the　strangeness　and　grandeur　of　that　big　room；　the　voices　of　the　others　who　were　sitting　in　the　library；　near　by；　the　mystery　of　the　spreading　crinoline　that　was　pressing　upon　my　knees；　I　had　not　half　the　courage　of　a　lover。

'My　friend　writes　me　that　you　are　in　love；'she　said；　opening　her　fan　and　moving　it　slowly；　as　she　looked　up　at　me。

'She　is　right　I　must　confess　it；'I　said；　'I　am　madly；　hopelessly　in　love。　It　is　time　you　knew　it　Hope　and　I　want　your　counsel。　

She　rose　quickly　and　turned　her　face　away。

'Do　not　tell　me　…　do　not　speak　of　it　again　…　I　forbid　you；'she　answered　coldly。

Then　she　stood　silent。　I　rose　to　take　her　hand　and　ask　her　to　tell　me　why；　a　pretty　rankling　in　my　heart；　Soft　footsteps　and　the　swish　of　a　gown　were　approaching。　Before　I　could　speak　Mrs　Fuller　had　come　through　the　doorway。

'Come　Hope；'she　said；　'I　cannot　let　you　sit　up　late　…　you　are　worn　out；　my　dear。　

Then　Hope　bade　us　both　good…night　and　went　away　to　her　room。　If　I　had　known　as　much　about　women　then；　as　now；　I　should　have　had　it　out；　with　short　delay；　to　some　understanding　between　us。　But　in　that　subject　one　loves　and　learns。　And　one　thing　I　have　learned　is　this；　that　jealousy　throws　its　illusions　on　every　word　and　look　and　act。　I　went　to　my　room　and　sat　down　for　a　bit　of　reckoning。　Hope　had　ceased　to　love　me；　I　felt　sure；　and　how　was　I　to　win　her　back？

After　all　my　castle　building　what　was　I　come　to？

I　heard　my　door　open　presently；　and　then　I　lifted　my　head。　Uncle　Eb　stood　near　me　in　his　stocking　feet　and　shirt…sleeves。

'In　trouble；'he　whispered。

'In　trouble；'I　said。

''Bout　Hope？　

'It's　about　Hope。　

'Don't　be　hasty。　Hope　ll　never　go　back　on　you；'he　whispered。　'She　doesn't　love　me；'I　said　impulsively。　'She　doesn't　care　the　snap　of　her　finger　for　me。　

'Don't　believe　it；'he　answered　calmly。　'Not　a　single　word　of　it。　Thet　woman　…　she's　tryin't'keep　her　away　from　ye　…　but　'twon't　make　no　differ　nce。　Not　a　bit。　

'I　must　try　to　win　her　back　…　someway　…　somehow；'I　whispered。

'Gi　n　ye　the　mitten？'he　asked。

'That's　about　it；'I　answered；　going　possibly　too　far　in　the　depth　of　my　feeling。

'Whew　w！'he　softly　whistled。　'Wall；　it　takes　two　mittens　t'make　a　pair　…　ye　ll　hey　t'ask　her　ag　in。　

'Yes　I　cannot　give　her　up；'I　said　decisively；　'I　must　try　to　win　her　back。　It　isn　t　fair。　I　have　no　claim　upon　her。　But　I　must　do　it。　

'Consarn　it！　women　like　t'be　chased；'he　said。　'It's　their　natur　。　What　do　they　fix　up　so　fer　…　di　mon's　an'silks　an'satins　…　if　'tain't　t'set　men　a　chasm'uv　'em？　You　d　otter　enjoy　it。　Stick　to　her　…　jes'like　a　puppy　to　a　root。　Thet's　my　advice。　'Hope　has　got　too　far　ahead　of　me；'I　said。　'She　can　many　a　rich　man　if　she　wishes　to；　and　I　don't　see　why　she　shouldn　t。　What　am　I；　anyhow；　but　a　poor　devil　just　out　of　college　and　everything　to　win？　It　makes　me　miserable　to　think　here　in　this　great　house　how　small　I　am。　

'There's　things　goin'　if　happen；'Uncle　Eb　whispered。　'I　can't　tell　ye　what　er　when　but　they　re　goin'　if　happen　an'　they　re　goin'　if　change　everything。　

We　sat　thinking　a　while　then。　I　knew　what　he　meant　…　that　I　was　to　conquer　the　world；　somehow；　and　the　idea　seemed　to　me　so　absurd　I　could　hardly　help　laughing　as　melancholy　as　I　felt。

'Now　you　go　if　bed；'he　said；　rising　and　gent