heartbreak house-第29部分

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few　diamonds。

THE　BURGLAR。　Ten　little　shining　diamonds！　Ten　long　black　years！

LADY　UTTERWORD。　Think　of　what　it　is　for　us　to　be　dragged　through
the　horrors　of　a　criminal　court；　and　have　all　our　family　affairs
in　the　papers！　If　you　were　a　native；　and　Hastings　could　order　you
a　good　beating　and　send　you　away；　I　shouldn't　mind；　but　here　in
England　there　is　no　real　protection　for　any　respectable　person。

THE　BURGLAR。　I'm　too　old　to　be　giv　a　hiding；　lady。　Send　for　the
police　and　have　done　with　it。　It's　only　just　and　right　you
should。

RANDALL　＇who　has　relaxed　his　vigilance　on　seeing　the　burglar　so
pacifically　disposed；　and　comes　forward　swinging　the　poker
between　his　fingers　like　a　well　folded　umbrella＇。　It　is　neither
just　nor　right　that　we　should　be　put　to　a　lot　of　inconvenience　to
gratify　your　moral　enthusiasm；　my　friend。　You　had　better　get　out；
while　you　have　the　chance。

THE　BURGLAR　＇inexorably＇。　No。　I　must　work　my　sin　off　my
conscience。　This　has　come　as　a　sort　of　call　to　me。　Let　me　spend
the　rest　of　my　life　repenting　in　a　cell。　I　shall　have　my　reward
above。

MANGAN　＇exasperated＇。　The　very　burglars　can't　behave　naturally　in
this　house。

HECTOR。　My　good　sir；　you　must　work　out　your　salvation　at　somebody
else's　expense。　Nobody　here　is　going　to　charge　you。

THE　BURGLAR。　Oh；　you　won't　charge　me；　won't　you？

HECTOR。　No。　I'm　sorry　to　be　inhospitable；　but　will　you　kindly
leave　the　house？

THE　BURGLAR。　Right。　I'll　go　to　the　police　station　and　give　myself
up。　＇He　turns　resolutely　to　the　door：　but　Hector　stops　him＇。

HECTOR。　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　｛　Oh；　no。　You　mustn't　do　that。
RANDALL。　　　　＇speaking　　　　｛　No　no。　Clear　out　man；　can't　you；　and
　　　　　　　　　　　　　together＇　　　　　　don't　be　a　fool。
MRS。　HUSHABYE　　　　　　　　　　　　｛　Don't　be　so　silly。　Can't　you　repent　at
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　home？

LADY　UTTERWORD。　You　will　have　to　do　as　you　are　told。

THE　BURGLAR。　It's　compounding　a　felony；　you　know。

MRS　HUSHABYE。　This　is　utterly　ridiculous。　Are　we　to　be　forced　to
prosecute　this　man　when　we　don't　want　to？

THE　BURGLAR。　Am　I　to　be　robbed　of　my　salvation　to　save　you　the
trouble　of　spending　a　day　at　the　sessions？　Is　that　justice？　Is　it
right？　Is　it　fair　to　me？

MAZZINI　＇rising　and　leaning　across　the　table　persuasively　as　if
it　were　a　pulpit　desk　or　a　shop　counter＇。　Come；　come！　let　me　show
you　how　you　can　turn　your　very　crimes　to　account。　Why　not　set　up
as　a　locksmith？　You　must　know　more　about　locks　than　most　honest
men？

THE　BURGLAR。　That's　true；　sir。　But　I　couldn't　set　up　as　a
locksmith　under　twenty　pounds。

RANDALL。　Well；　you　can　easily　steal　twenty　pounds。　You　will　find
it　in　the　nearest　bank。

THE　BURGLAR　＇horrified＇。　Oh；　what　a　thing　for　a　gentleman　to　put
into　the　head　of　a　poor　criminal　scrambling　out　of　the　bottomless
pit　as　it　were！　Oh；　shame　on　you；　sir！　Oh；　God　forgive　you！　＇He
throws　himself　into　the　big　chair　and　covers　his　face　as　if　in
prayer＇。

LADY　UTTERWORD。　Really；　Randall！

HECTOR。　It　seems　to　me　that　we　shall　have　to　take　up　a　collection
for　this　inopportunely　contrite　sinner。

LADY　UTTERWORD。　But　twenty　pounds　is　ridiculous。

THE　BURGLAR　＇looking　up　quickly＇。　I　shall　have　to　buy　a　lot　of
tools；　lady。

LADY　UTTERWORD。　Nonsense：　you　have　your　burgling　kit。

THE　BURGLAR。　What's　a　jimmy　and　a　centrebit　and　an　acetylene
welding　plant　and　a　bunch　of　skeleton　keys？　I　shall　want　a　forge；
and　a　smithy；　and　a　shop；　and　fittings。　I　can't　hardly　do　it　for
twenty。

HECTOR。　My　worthy　friend；　we　haven't　got　twenty　pounds。

THE　BURGLAR　＇now　master　of　the　situation＇。　You　can　raise　it　among
you；　can't　you？

MRS　HUSHABYE。　Give　him　a　sovereign；　Hector；　and　get　rid　of　him。

HECTOR　＇giving　him　a　pound＇。　There！　Off　with　you。

THE　BURGLAR　＇rising　and　taking　the　money　very　ungratefully＇。　I
won't　promise　nothing。　You　have　more　on　you　than　a　quid：　all　the
lot　of　you；　I　mean。

LADY　UTTERWORD　＇vigorously＇。　Oh；　let　us　prosecute　him　and　have
done　with　it。　I　have　a　conscience　too；　I　hope；　and　I　do　not　feel
at　all　sure　that　we　have　any　right　to　let　him　go；　especially　if
he　is　going　to　be　greedy　and　impertinent。

THE　BURGLAR　＇quickly＇。　All　right；　lady；　all　right。　I've　no　wish
to　be　anything　but　agreeable。　Good　evening；　ladies　and　gentlemen；
and　thank　you　kindly。

He　is　hurrying　out　when　he　is　confronted　in　the　doorway　by
Captain　Shotover。

CAPTAIN　SHOTOVER　＇fixing　the　burglar　with　a　piercing　regard＇。
What's　this？　Are　there　two　of　you？

THE　BURGLAR　＇falling　on　his　knees　before　the　captain　in　abject
terror＇。　Oh；　my　good　Lord；　what　have　I　done？　Don't　tell　me　it's
your　house　I've　broken　into；　Captain　Shotover。

The　captain　seizes　him　by　the　collar：　drags　him　to　his　feet：　and
leads　him　to　the　middle　of　the　group；　Hector　falling　back　beside
his　wife　to　make　way　for　them。

CAPTAIN　SHOTOVER　＇turning　him　towards　Ellie＇。　Is　that　your
daughter？　＇He　releases　him＇。

THE　BURGLAR。　Well；　how　do　I　know；　Captain？　You　know　the　sort　of
life　you　and　me　has　led。　Any　young　lady　of　that　age　might　be　my
daughter　anywhere　in　the　wide　world；　as　you　might　say。

CAPTAIN　SHOTOVER　＇to　Mazzini＇。　You　are　not　Billy　Dunn。　This　is
Billy　Dunn。　Why　have　you　imposed　on　me？

THE　BURGLAR　＇indignantly　to　Mazzini＇。　Have　you　been　giving
yourself　out　to　be　me？　You；　that　nigh　blew　my　head　off！　Shooting
yourself；　in　a　manner　of　speaking！

MAZZINI。　My　dear　Captain　Shotover；　ever　since　I　came　into　this
house　I　have　done　hardly　anything　else　but　assure　you　that　I　am
not　Mr　William　Dunn；　but　Mazzini　Dunn；　a　very　different　person。

THE　BURGLAR。　He　don't　belong　to　my　branch；　Captain。　There's　two
sets　in　the　family：　the　thinking　Dunns　and　the　drinking　Dunns；
each　going　their　own　ways。　I'm　a　drinking　Dunn：　he's　a　thinking
Dunn。　But　that　didn't　give　him　any　right　to　shoot　me。

CAPTAIN　SHOTOVER。　So　you've　turned　burglar；　have　you？

THE　BURGLAR。　No；　Captain：　I　wouldn't　disgrace　our　old　sea　calling
by　such　a　thing。　I　am　no　burglar。

LADY　UTTERWORD。　What　were　you　doing　with　my　diamonds？

GUINNESS。　What　did　you　break　into　the　house　for　if　you're　no
burglar？

RANDALL。　Mistook　the　house　for　your　own　and　came　in　by　the　wrong
window；　eh？

THE　BURGLAR。　Well；　it's　no　use　my　telling　you　a　lie：　I　can　take
in　most　captains；　but　not　Captain　Shotover；　because　he　sold
himself　to　the　devil　in　Zanzibar；　and　can　divine　water；　spot
gold；　explode　a　cartridge　in　your　pocket　with　a　glance　of　his
eye；　and　see　the　truth　hidden　in　the　heart　of　man。　But　I'm　no
burglar。

CAPTAIN　SHOTOVER。　Are　you　an　honest　man？

THE　BURGLAR。　I　don't　set　up　to　be　better　than　my
fellow…creatures；　and　never　did；　as　you　well　know；　Captain。　But
what　I　do　is　innocent　and　pious。　I　enquire　about　for　houses　where
the　right　sort　of　people　live。　I　work　it　on　them　same　as　I　worked
it　here。　I　break　into　the　house；　put　a　few　spoons　or　diamonds　in
my　pocket；　make　a　noise；　get　caught；　and　take　up　a　collection。
And　you　wouldn't　believe　how　hard　it　is　to　get　caught　when　you're
actually　trying　to。　I　have　knocked　over　all　the　chairs　in　a　room
without　a　soul　paying　any　attention　to　me。　In　the　end　I　have　had
to　walk　out　and　leave　the　job。

RANDALL。　When　that　happens；　do　you　put　back　the　spoons　and
diamonds？

THE　BU