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the golden threshold(署弼議壇寿)-及2何蛍
酔楯荷恬: 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈 梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何! 泌惚云慕短嗤堋響頼���誅卒亮茂�俊彭堋響��辛聞喘貧圭 "辺茄欺厘議箝誓匂" 孔嬬 才 "紗秘慕禰" 孔嬬��
great white beard and the profile of Homer�察 �and a laugh that brings the
roof down。 He has wasted all his money on two great objects�此�to help
others�察�and on alchemy。 He holds huge courts every day in his garden of
all the learned men of all religionsRajahs and beggars and saints and
downright villains all delightfully mixed up�察�and all treated as one。 And
then his alchemy� �Oh dear�察�night and day the experiments are going on�察�
and every man who brings a new prescription is welcome as a brother。
But this alchemy is�察 �you know�察 �only the material counterpart of a poet's
craving for Beauty�察 �the eternal Beauty。 'The makers of gold and the
makers of verse��' they are the twin creators that sway the world's secret
desire for mystery�察�and what in my father is the genius of curiositythe
very essence of all scientific geniusin me is the desire for beauty。 Do
you remember Pater's phrase about Leonardo da Vinci�察�'curiosity and the
desire of beauty'�拭─�
It was the desire of beauty that made her a poet�察�her ;nerves of delight;
were always quivering at the contact of beauty。 To those who knew her
in England�察�all the life of the tiny figure seemed to concentrate itself in the
eyes�察�they turned towards beauty as the sunflower turns towards the sun�察�
opening wider and wider until one saw nothing but the eyes。
She was dressed always in clinging dresses of Eastern silk�察�and as she
was so small�察�and her long black hair hung straight down her back�察�you
might have taken her for a child。 She spoke little�察 �and in a low voice�察�
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THE GOLDEN THRESHOLD
like gentle music�察�and she seemed�察�wherever she was�察�to be alone。
Through that soul I seemed to touch and take hold upon the East。
And first there was the wisdom of the East。 I have never known any one
who seemed to exist on such ;large draughts of intellectual day; as this
child of seventeen�察�to whom one could tell all one's personal troubles and
agitations�察 �as to a wise old woman。 In the East�察 �maturity comes early�察�
and this child had already lived through all a woman's life。 But there was
something else�察�something hardly personal�察�something which belonged to
a consciousness older than the Christian�察 �which I realised�察 �wondered at�察�
and admired�察 �in her passionate tranquillity of mind�察 �before which
everything mean and trivial and temporary caught fire and burnt away in
smoke。 Her body was never without suffering�察 �or her heart without
conflict�察 �but neither the body's weakness nor the heart's violence could
disturb that fixed contemplation�察�as of Buddha on his lotus´throne。
And along with this wisdom�察�as of age or of the age of a race�察�there
was what I can hardly call less than an agony of sensation。 Pain or
pleasure transported her�察�and the whole of pain or pleasure might be held
in a flower's cup or the imagined frown of a friend。 It was never found in
those things which to others seemed things of importance。 At the age of
twelve she passed the Matriculation of the Madras University�察�and awoke
to find herself famous throughout India。 ;Honestly�察─�she said to me�察 �I
was not pleased�察�such things did not appeal to me。; But here�察�in a letter
from Hyderabad�察�bidding one ;share a March morning; with her�察�there is�察�
at the mere contact of the sun�察 �this outburst�此 �Come and share my
exquisite March morning with me�此 �this sumptuous blaze of gold and
sapphire sky�察 �these scarlet lilies that adorn the sunshine�察 �the voluptuous
scents of neem and champak and serisha that beat upon the languid air
with their implacable sweetness�察 �the thousand little gold and blue and
silver breasted birds bursting with the shrill ecstasy of life in nesting time。
All is hot and fierce and passionate�察�ardent and unashamed in its exulting
and importunate desire for life and love。 And�察�do you know that the scarlet
lilies are woven petal by petal from my heart's blood�察�these little quivering
birds are my soul made incarnate music�察 �these heavy perfumes are my
emotions dissolved into aerial essence�察�this flaming blue and gold sky is
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THE GOLDEN THRESHOLD
the 'very me��' that part of me that incessantly and in´ solently�察�yes�察�and a
little deliberately�察 �triumphs over that other parta thing of nerves and
tissues that suffers and cries out�察�and that must die to´morrow perhaps�察�or
twenty years hence。;
Then there was her humour�察 �which was part of her strange wisdom�察�
and was always awake and on the watch。 In all her letters�察 �written in
exquisite English prose�察 �but with an ardent imagery and a vehement
sincerity of emotion which make them�察 �like the poems�察 �indeed almost
more directly�察 �un´English�察 �Oriental�察 �there was always this intellectual�察�
critical sense of humour�察 �which could laugh at one's own enthusiasm as
frankly as that enthusiasm had been set down。 And partly the humour�察�
like the delicate reserve of her manner�察�was a mask or a shelter。 ;I have
taught myself�察─�she writes to me from India�察 �to be commonplace and like
everybody else superficially。 Every one thinks I am so nice and cheerful�察�
so 'brave��' all the banal things that are so comfortable to be。 My mother
knows me only as 'such a tranquil child�察�but so strong´willed。' A tranquil
child� ─�And she writes again�察�with deeper significance�此 �I too have learnt
the subtle philosophy of living from moment to moment。 Yes�察 �it is a
subtle philosophy�察�though it appears merely an epicurean doctrine�此 �'Eat�察�
drink�察�and be merry�察�for to´morrow we die。' I have gone through so many
yesterdays when I strove with Death that I have realised to its full the
wisdom of that sentence�察�and it is to me not merely a figure of speech�察�but
a literal fact。 Any to´morrow I might die。 It is scarcely two months
since I came back from the grave�此 �is it worth while to be anythin
酔楯荷恬: 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈 梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何!
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